It’s appropriate that the challenge today would talk about why I chose to do this 500 words a day writing thing. I was told to figure out what my motivation is. To create a plan and set some goals. Answer questions that show I plan to accomplish something.
Guess what? It’s 11:09 pm and I am just sitting down to write. So, basically I have given myself 41 minutes to come up with answers to the above. I guess that last minute fear of failure really does something for me. Just kidding. Actually, it doesn’t. Normally at this time of the night I’d accept “failure” and go to bed with the heaviness that comes from once again not being able to do what I say I’m going to do.
But I want to go to bed with a different feeling tonight. So here I am. Writing. I chose to do this challenge for one simple reason. I want to know that I can write 500 words every day if I choose to. I want to build the habit of writing. Even if it’s poo. To not always edit myself, but to just let what is in my head out. To know that I can do this.
I want to accomplish something that I set my mind to do that is just for me, a personal goal.
I’m too tired to think of how I am going to be consistent for 30 days, but I did find myself cleaning the bedroom and bathroom and setting a plan for the next day. In the cleaning I saw my personal laptop, not my work one, so I cleaned the desk. This was a strategic move actually.
While I brought laundry in and out, I saw my laptop sitting open. It appeared to be waiting for me. I would have to touch it before I went to bed so the screen’s glow would not keep me awake. I’d have to make contact so why not write the pre-bedtime gibberish and hit my daily goal? Even though I may not have planned out my writing, I did plan out my space where I will do some writing. Yay! Failure zero, Aimee one!
I know so many other writers would tell me that I did my evening all backwards. That in order to be successful at this I need to leave the laundry piled up and the room dirty and just sit down and write.
But I think one of the goals I have for myself is to find what works for me. Who am I as a writer? What works for me? What do I need to care for prior to sitting down at my laptop?
Today it was being the wife I wish I took more time to be. It was cleaning our bedroom, tending to my sweet husband who has the flu, knowing that I won’t have to dig for a clean shirt or a fresh smelling towel in the morning before work. Knowing I prepared my home for space to create.
Knowing I prepared me.
And guess what? I wrote over 500 words. And with that, I am going to sleep well because I did what I told myself I would do.